Origins: The middle of an MRI, shortly after the events in “Gods and Doctors.” Stuck inside that suffocating, coffin-like tube for what felt like forever. Sirius XM First Wave playing over the headphones, only partially blocking the banging and vibrating of the metal coils. “Friday I’m in Love” comes on: the worst song the Cure ever wrote, on an otherwise excellent album. I can’t move, can’t ask to change stations. Forced to listen, I suddenly remember watching that Monty Python sketch, in The Meaning of Life, pretty much as it is in the story. I can see the bulky television with rabbit-ear antennae, the VHS cassette case open and sitting on top of the VCR. I can even see the pattern in the patchwork quilt on the bed, the imperfections in the hand-stitching. Remember what it feels like to be a teenager, half-adult and still half-child, watching a weird and hilarious movie with my friends, who also happen to be the most important people on the planet.
Before that, I had experimented with multiple narrators and points of view, relying heavily on adults remembering what it meant to be young. But it is really only that girl’s story to tell. So she does.
Published in: Cagibi.
Number of drafts: It feels like a million, but is more like 40. Most of it was written during a period of horrible insomnia; in the morning I’d reread what I’d put down late the night before and think “Huh. I barely remember writing that.”
Rejections: 29. Of those, five were higher tier (including one from december). All the rest were flat, thanks-but-no-thanks form rejections.
I knew this was going to be hard to place, partly because of its length, the second-person narration, the time period, and, finally, the young female narrator. One middle-aged male reader told me, bluntly, “I am not, and never will be, interested in anything a teenage girl has to say. ” Fortunately, another (female) reader said “Anyone who’s ever been a young girl will understand.”
The acceptance came one year to the day after the events in “Gods and Doctors.”
Length of time between submission and acceptance: 182 days.
Music: In addition to the songs mentioned in the story itself:
The Cramps, “I Was A Teenage Werewolf”
The Cure, Standing on a Beach
“Mr. Pink Eyes”
“A Man Inside My Mouth”
“Grinding Halt”
“The Lovecats”
The Pixies, “Lovely Day”
“Debaser”
“Gouge Away”
The Clash, “Should I Stay or Should I Go?”
R. Renee Branca 